The Letter Gee

I hate this game that you play with me.

You know, the one where you don’t say a word to me but there’s something obviously bothering you.

BUT GURLZ LYKE BAD GUYZ M I RITE YA NICE GUYZ FINSH LAST ZZZZ YOLO

LOL

Sometimes, I suck at being a good guy for you.

Day 40: Easter Disappointment.

That moment when you start to get excited for something, only to have things crash down on your face.

Am I mad? Maybe. Do I have the right to be? Definitely. Why? Because you don’t want it as bad as I do. It’s not as big a deal for you. So, why don’t I say something? Because I love you. I know being mad won’t fix anything. I’m not going to dictate your life. But that doesn’t mean I’m not hurt.

Maybe it’s for the best. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be. Maybe it means something. Maybe I’ll learn.

Maybe I should stop setting myself up for this sort of thing.

moody

I’m growing tired of my imperfections.

I don’t think you can control how you feel about someone. Maybe you can try to stop yourself from getting attached, but let’s face it. Once you fall, you’re trapped. A part of you will always linger on and think about the person even when you’re doing it unconsciously.

(Source: mahalkitax3, via seanlikesrice)

Getaway.

I don’t have a car, or even a license, so it’s pretty tough for me to take myself out of certain situations when I don’t want to be or shouldn’t be in or around them. This doesn’t mean getting away from it all is impossible for me. On the contrary, it’s quite possible, and I do it almost every day. Gaming is my escape. It always has been, and always will be. When I grip the wheel that is my controller and fill the gas tank that is the disk drive, I can go anywhere, from frozen forts to burning wastelands, from the streets of the Le Mans circuit to the explosive skies of aerial combat.

Sometimes, when I get there, I feel disconnected from the rest of the world, and let me tell you: it feels magnificent.

The only downside is that when the engine turns off, everything comes crashing down on me, and I’m always left thinking of better ways to use my time. Like the constant waves of the ocean on the beach, the answer is always the same: nothing is better.